Thought Of The Day

I kinda wish Hillary Clinton would have won the presidential election, not because i think she'd make a good president but only because i've never seen a woman assassinated before.


Secret Superman

Here's an idea. Dress up in a trench-coat and hat and try to look as creepy as possible. Then, find someone you dont know's funeral, preferably an open casket funeral, and go lean into his coffin and say slowly but loud enough for everyone to hear, "checkmate. i win!" and then run off. The people at the funeral will either think you are the deceased's arch-nemesis or a super-villain, either way they won't forget you and it will raise questions about whether or not the dead person was in fact a superhero that noone knew of.

Moral Of The Story: If you crash a wedding you get free cake, but if you crash a funeral you create a superhero.


Religious Facebook

So i finally ended up adding my church pastor to my friendlist on facebook, i didn't really think much of it but as you know church people status updates always stand out coz they never don't involve God. His status updates are never like "I'm going shopping", they're more like "Thank God for stores!" I like to look at my homepage now to see how his status updates fit in with my overly-drunk classmates' statuses. Yesterday i checked and his status was the first one and it said, "I'd like to thank the Lord for this beautiful day and my two gorgeous sons. I love picnics" and the one that followed was my friend Tom's which was "The f*cking Lakers can go suck a d*ck!"

Moral Of The Story: Add a religious person, it makes social networking more interesting.


Thought Of The Day

If women are honest they'll tell you they like a man who's strong, with muscular shoulders, washboard stomach etc. but they also want a man who's sensitive and can understand their needs and emotions. But ladies you can't have that guy; coz that guy probably has a boyfriend!